No Bull

I was the kid that was made fun of and picked on repeatedly growing up. So my insights on this topic come from not only learning how to deal with bullying but on how to overcome this issue…not only with people, but emotionally as well. One thing we all need to remember is that every bully is someone who has some sort of power, but is extremely insecure in their own life. Belittling and hurting others is the only way that they know how to have value in their own life. The second thing that we need to remember is that church and societal culture over the last 50 years has made bullying possible to the levels that it’s gotten to because of the untrue philosophy of “if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all”. Nothing stops a bully faster than someone who stands up for themselves. And nothing makes bullying more possible than someone who doesn’t feel that they are allowed to defend themselves. Each of us has to ask ourselves this one question, “who determines our value?” Many people determine their value based on what other people think. Others determine their value on their self worth. The trouble with this is that setting our value on our own sinful nature or someone else’s sinful nature is that we devalue ourselves. It’s not until you truly understand that God created you with a purpose and regardless of what happens in your life, the value that God has given you remains constant. This same God created you with a body that protects itself, if you feel heat-you react to protect yourself. Why is it that when your body tells you that you are about to be hurt physically OR emotionally by someone, the church and society today tells you that you can’t defend yourself and hopes that someone else will fix the problem. Does this mean that if you accidentally burn yourself on the stove that you need to leave your hand sit there burning until someone else can come and protect you? Definitely not!!! The same goes for our interaction with other people. It is ok, Scripturally, to ignore somebody and walk away if they are treating you wrongly. I am sure this isn’t politically correct, but as a kid, it’s ok to punch somebody in the nose and tell them to leave me alone, as an adult, it’s ok to tell someone to “shut up and leave me alone!” Not because that’s what’s in your heart, but that’s what bullies understand. What we all need to remember, is that regardless of what society and churches teach us today about just being nice to everybody, the Bible teaches us that there is a time and a place for defending ourselves and others. There is a time and a place for taking action to protect ourselves and others. A great example of this: Was Jesus being nice when He took the time to build a whip and chase the “bullies” out of the temple? No, He was protecting His Father’s house and the people who were unable to defend themselves. Why did He do this??? He did it because He loves us. And sometimes loving people requires discipline and justice. And at the same time, He loved the same people He was chasing out of the temple. We, too, need to come to grips with the understanding that it’s ok to defend ourselves and STILL love someone and that God won’t take our “heaven card” away because we weren’t being nice. If anyone else has questions, feel free to get ahold of me at 241ink.org.

Signed,
“Stupid Dyslexic Kid” who is actually succeeding in the world, regardless of what everyone told him as a kid!

Geremy